Married Americans
In the 1950s, almost everybody got married and usually at a young age. Almost nobody got divorced. Marriage was the normal state. Things have changed. Britain’s marriage rate is now at its lowest level since 1895. In 2014, the percentage of Americans, sixteen years and over, that were single was fifty percent of the population. [3] In 1976 the figure was thirty-seven percent of the population. [3] This is a massive fall and the trend appears to be magnifying. It appears that we are going through the worst time in recorded history for marriage. The state of matrimony is in serious crisis. This graph shows an alarming trend.
This chapter could be called: “How to get a man to marry you.” or “How to find a man that will marry you.” Many females wait patiently for a proposal to arrive from their boyfriend but finish up unmarried and heartbroken. Let us analyze the problem and puzzle a solution.
The problem has many faces. At a simple level, we can consider history. Males in the past married to obtain sex and create a family. The man would fall in love, but he had to get married to the ‘love of his life’ before he could bed her. This procedure has been in place throughout recorded history and was probably in place for most of our time as hunter-gatherers. In the west, it was called the “Christian value system” which was primarily passed from mother to child and supported externally by the Church. I believe that the true Christianity is the value system that is passed from mother to child with the support of the father, extended family, the Church, and the rest of the community. Other religions have variants of the same system.
If a value system or religion did not support the ‘family unit’ as a basis of the structure of society, that society disappeared. The ‘family unit’ requires a discipline in the male and female as well as a support network comprising the extended family and the society at large. This protocol has been tipped on its head in my lifetime. The replacement procedures are not working.
When more women become sexually available, the available pool of marriageable men decreases. In a society where women are tempted to say: “Yes”, the man is not placed in a situation where he has to make a serious decision about marriage. Sex was invented by biology. Marriage was invented by civilization. Sex is nature whilst marriage is a convention. Marriage was the building block of civilization. It created the core family unit that nurtured and trained the young to follow the ways of the civilized world. Thus it was necessary to coax persons into marriage for the benefit of society. The method was to restrict sex until they married. Marriage had to become monogamous — one woman tied with one man. This created a stable unit for the upbringing of well-adjusted children. It minimized nasty little diseases. Unskilled younger males did not need to compete with skilled older males for younger females. Young males got young females. Old men had to put up with their old women which conveniently kept them away from younger females. There are a host of reasons why males were restricted by marriage to one woman. Wealthy males have always honed their skills to get a higher share of young females and they still do by some means or other.
There are many other issues at play here with regard to males and marriage. According to the Pew Research Center, less young men in the USA wish to get married. The desire for marriage by young women is rising. [2013 figures] [4] The Pew report found that, since 1997, the number of women from eighteen to thirty-four saying that: “having a successful marriage” was “important” rose from twenty-eight percent to thirty-seven percent. The number of young males saying this same thing dropped significantly from thirty-five percent to twenty-nine percent. [4] This represents a seventeen percent fall. Since the 1970s, the number of African Americans who are married has decreased by more than thirty percent. More than seventy percent of African American children are born out of wedlock. A stunning statistic!
Women wish to get married. Men don’t wish to get married. My mother mentioned: “Marriage Shy Men” as if it was the fault of males. That is why I used it in the title. The issue is not shyness. There are males that wish to get married. Some are awake enough to realize that marriage leads to babies and family. We need to look at the logic of the situation. When I ask the males in the age range of twenty-five to thirty-five: “You blokes going to get married?”, the answer is always of the form: “Who the fuck wants to get married. It’s a disaster.”
It is sometimes called: “Commitment-Phobia” as if it is a fault in the male. It is also called “Relationship Anxiety” as if it is some faulty wiring in the male brain. Some write sentences such as: “He is Commitment-Phobic?” which could also be written as: “He didn’t want to marry the crazy girl.” Just because the male does not wish to do something does not mean that he is afraid to do it. There is a difference between a phobia — which is an irrational fear — and a reasonable fear of working as a wage slave to pay child support and alimony for the rest of his working life. Others write: “Commitment-Phobic males are tortured souls full of fear.” when they could have written: “Males are justifiably afraid of marriage because there are more downsides than upsides.” Some go so far as calling ‘Commitment Phobia’ a personality disorder. You will find many elegant articles suggesting that commitment-phobia is a ‘fault’ in the male. These articles never mention that he is scared to death about the potential changes to the relationship after marriage. He has plenty of anecdotal evidence that marriage is not a good place to be. There is very little incentive to get married. The man has a lot to lose and little to gain. In the words of Leonardo da Vinci: “Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel.” How many times would a male need to watch the video clip entitled: “Women make fun of man whose penis was cut off” before he became concerned about the attitude of women towards a marriage partner. This video has a group of chat-show hosts giggling, supported by a laughing audience. They are laughing about a man that had his penis cut off by his wife. Yet the same male might be labelled: “Commitment-Phobic”, by the same idiots. Not one of these women had any sympathy for the male. Imagine losing your penis to a garbage blender and seeing women on TV laughing about it. These women are a disgrace to the human race. It is not a phobia. It is common-sense practical thinking. When someone else is not acting in the way that you desire, it is not appropriate to assume that it is a fault in their behaviour. Men would call it woman’s logic. Frustrating as it may be, he is thinking rationally. What would happen to a man that severed parts of his wife?
On a practical level for the female, if your male is becoming more distant, you may not need to assume that he stopped loving you. He may be turning himself inside out on the subject of commitment. This is more likely to manifest itself at the four-year mark.
Males have good reason:
One blogger writes
Don’t get married - check
Don’t have kids - check
Don’t have LTR’s - check
Don’t have sex - Err no, I’ll wear a condom and take my chances! Each to their own but don’t think I’m ready to give that up.
Wikipedia says: “Not every person experiences sexual desire.” But The Conversation says “Men do think about sex more than women (34 times compared to 19 times a day...), but men also think about food and sleep more than women. So, men are needs-driven creatures, not sex-driven per se.” Borrowing from Noam Shpancer at Psychology Today [27]: “We want sex because our continued existence as a species depends on it. Children come from sex.” [27] And continuing: “Most sex happening right now around the world is not procreative.” [27] And strangely enough, people even get shocked when their activity results in pregnancy. Noam Shpancer, using the logic of Randall Collins, moves on to suggest that sex has an element of social connectedness. Sexual pleasure can be adequately obtained by masturbation, and reason would say that the connectedness is the component involved between couples. “Human beings, fundamentally, are distinctly, spectacularly social.” [27] Meaning arrives through connectedness. “Sexual desire, thus, is not chiefly aimed at physical pleasure or the production of children, but at connectedness with others.” [27] Even I find that it is the ‘connectedness’ with others that gives meaning. So I enjoy running a wine-tour with seventy twenty-one-year-olds because there is a connectedness. On wine-tours, they detect that I am an easy person to get on with and ask me ‘life’s questions’ which then become the source and motivation to write these books. My books answer the questions asked by young people on wine-tours.
Some authors claim that the male, in particular, experiences sex as a physical need. They argue that the body tells us when we are hungry, or thirsty, or tired. The man’s body tells him when he needs a sexual release. I notice that, if I go to be when hungry, when I wake up, I am not hungry. I effectively go for perhaps twelve hours with no food. During the day, my subconscious brain reminds me that food is a priority. But the hunger sensation does not appear to work like the fuel meter in my car. It is more like my brain says “It is about time you had something to eat.” It ignores that I might have an inch too much fat on my body. My subconscious also gives me reminders about sex by stopping my thought processes and bringing up an icon image of a recent female that I have met. Sometimes my gonads have a strange mild ache suggesting to me that they need to be utilised. If I wait a while, the sensation goes away. I think sex is a balance between need and desire. Strangely, when I ask males “If you are hungry, which comes first sex or food?” The answer is: “Sex.” Males were designed as a fucking machine for a reason.
The common statement: “Women aren’t women anymore.” tells us that it is women that have changed, not men. Men ask me: “Andy. Where do we find ‘good’ girls.” I interpret this as these males wish to find girls with whom they might have a committed relationship. Girls that jump in and out of bed are treated as temporary toys. Irrespective of the heavy propaganda to the contrary, it is difficult to accept that it is men that are to blame for this situation. Under the circumstances, we cannot wait a lifetime or two for men to change. We cannot suddenly make males enthusiastic about marriage. Gone are the days when a man would commit to marriage within two weeks of meeting a girl. In those days, he could rely on a harmonious relationship that would be long-lasting. They could say: “until death do us part” and mean it. The couple grew together as a unit and faced life’s issues together. You still see these couples walking around the supermarket — still holding hands and blowing kisses at each other. In his wallet, there will be a picture of his life-long sweetheart as he met her as a teenager. Both were virgins when they met and neither strayed. They have a lifelong list of shared experiences and memories. Nowadays, there is a serious battleground for females trying to bring a male to the altar.
You can yell and scream expletives and curse the male. You can berate males at every opportunity, but you cannot force them to marry you. You can cheer each time some anti-male comment is made. You can cheer when, in a film, a male is thrown out of a window by a female. You can cheer when a female beats a male at a game of pool, but this will not encourage males to marry. If a male perceives marriage to be a road to emotional devastation, divorce, and a lifetime of alimony, he would be an idiot to marry. If a male thinks about marriage, he is also going to think of divorce. The divorce rate is horrendously high. Said male may perceive more disincentives to marriage than incentives. By the time that a male is in his mid-twenties, he will have heard from older males: “I was ‘done over’ by a woman.” It matters little whether it is correct or not, he will have heard it. This will make him reluctant to commit. There is no compulsion on a male to marry. His DNA drives him to chase and copulate. It may cause him to fall in love. It may cause him to care for you and protect you. But no DNA signal is present to marry. Marriage is a convention. Marriage is a human invention. Marriage is a tradition. Marriage became institutionalized when we became civilized. Men were tied into a situation from which they could not escape to provide sustenance and support for children for the benefit of society. Before the religion of civilization, males could ‘court, copulate, and run’ as they do in much of the animal kingdom and as the human male has started to do again. It was the taming of the males into fathers that enabled civilization. It was religions that maintained the rules demanded by civilians. Fatherhood is an essential part of civilization. Women have enthusiastically broken with convention in the last fifty years whilst men have changed less. Men have embraced porn and video games, but it wasn’t a banner waving exercise down the main street. Women have been demanding individualism and individual rights whilst marriage is a joint unit. There is an uncomfortable clash of concept. How about the male that converted his bank account to a joint account in joint names when he married. He put his income into the joint account. When she eventually joined the workforce, she put ‘her’ money into a separate account that was for her use only whilst remaining a signatory on the joint account into which the male put all his income. Thankfully, men don’t hear too many of these shenanigans or even fewer males would marry. This reinforces the stereotype that the woman thinks: “What is yours is mine and what is mine is mine.” We call it tying the knot, but under the current balance of power, the knot is around the neck of the male. The knot was always around the male neck, but now the knot is killing the male. But the real issue is that fatherhood is in crisis and that the best interests of the children are in crisis. The real rights that are damaged in a marriage crisis are the rights of the child. The victimization and disenfranchisement of males is taking its toll on children, society, and women. The current status quo has created a significant body of men that state that they will never marry. We are talking: “slave rebellion”.
Throughout history, we have never had a problem getting women to get married, but we have always had a problem getting males to get married. It is why the rules were made the way they were. Here is an interesting graph from Pew. It shows the number of men per one-hundred women that are employed. In the words of Pew:
“The new Pew Research survey findings suggest that never-married women place a high premium on finding a spouse with a steady job. However, the changes in the labor market have contributed to a shrinking pool of available men.”
For Young, Never-Married Women, the Pool of Employed Young Men Has Shrunk
This next graph shows that older girls have a very low chance of getting married:
Chance of a never-married woman getting married in the next five years.
Even Martin Luther wrote on the matter as far back as 1522. In his ‘Von chelichen Leben’, (The Estate of Married Life) he writes:
“What we would speak most of is the fact that the estate of marriage has universally fallen into such awful disrepute. There are many pagan books which treat of nothing but the depravity of womankind and the unhappiness of the estate of marriage ... So they [young men listening to advice] concluded that woman is a necessary evil, and that no household can be without such an evil. ... For this reason young men should be on their guard when they read pagan books and hear the common complaints about marriage, lest they inhale poison. For the estate of marriage does not sell well with the devil, because it is God’s good will and work. This is why the devil has contrived to have so much shouted and written in the world against the institution of marriage, to frighten men away from this godly life and entangle them in a web of fornication and secret sins. .... The world says of marriage, ‘Brief is the joy, lasting the bitterness’.”
So even Martin Luther reports that in 1522, the common saying is: “Brief is the joy, lasting the bitterness.” Marriage needs to appear as enjoyable for males to submit. If you change ‘Devil’ to ‘Satan’s Pulpit’, The above applies today. ‘Pagan books’ becomes ‘porn’ and ‘depravity of womankind’ is ‘hook-up’ culture and ‘web of fornication’ is the ‘cock-carousel’ along with dating sites.
A woman riding the ‘cock-carousel’ is described on Urban Dictionary as:
“A promiscuous female in her twenties having sex with alpha males. When they hit their thirties and lose their looks, they realize they wasted their prime man-snagging years and become desperate to settle down, often with a boring, dependable flavor of guy they previously had no interest in.”
One subscriber on Reddit writes:
“The cock carousel is amazing for women. It’s like heroin, it feels amazing but ruins your life. That’s why so many of them ride it — it’s super fun. They simply fail to realize that they are making themselves shitty Long-Term-Relationship material because of it, and once they hit the wall and their ‘Sexual Market Value’ plummets, it’s already too late to start thinking.”
The writer then gives some man-to-man advice that is often described by males as: “pump and dump” or “f*ck and chuck”. Remember, that males can only do this if girls say: “Yes”.
“Remember, don’t go whining about it. Be on the side that benefits from this decline. Sell that heroin and make a profit from it. Increase your ‘Sexual Market Value’ and you can take full advantage of the situation. Fuck as much as you want and grab a fresh one when you get older, that’s the name of the game.”
The ‘Cock-Carousel’ means having sex with numerous males over many years, typically during a girl’s twenties. The typical ‘Cock-Carousel’ rider tends to have difficulty committing to a traditional relationship and following the role of mother or wife. [25]
The girl at eighteen is flattered by the number of males that are interested in her. She sleeps with a different man each week. Maybe she gets to age twenty-five and thinks: “I have men chasing me all the time. Now, I’ll just choose one and marry him.” — Uh! Oh! It does not work like that. The males are reluctant to commit to a girl that has no history of commitment. She expects a male to commit to a girl that has never committed. Again, boys would call it: “Woman’s logic.” The male is concerned that she may flit off to yet another male without warning. She is more capable of changing males than staying with males. It is the same with employment. If you look for a job and you have had numerous jobs but none longer than a month, you are unlikely to land the job unless they are desperate. Males say to me: “Andy. If they have been sleeping around, when you talk with them, you can sniff it out.”
If you want stupid advice, it is plentiful. Here is an example where a columnist suggests to get a life partner, screw every male in town, then find someone to marry you that has a strict set of criteria. The male has his criteria which happens to be that the girl has not slept with every man in town. Magnificent illogic at its most dangerous. For some reason, women seen to believe this illogic:
“When looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier.” [Sheryl Sandberg, Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead]
‘Smart, opinionated, and ambitious’ can be translated to male logic as a woman that is: ‘argumentative, know all, and self-interested woman that values her career more than her family’. Men may have fallen for this in the past, but they have woken up to reality. Men now advise each other: “Don’t touch a woman like this with a barge pole”. There is another expression called: “hamster” which is described by Jagrmeister as:
“The Hamster (short for ‘Rationalization Hamster’) is the instinctive mechanism women use to avoid responsibility for their decisions. She misrepresents the nature of what took place in order to preserve her fragile emotional state and to save face amongst her social circle. It is especially common when the woman arrives at her decision through Primitive Instinct, wherein she herself doesn’t understand the reasons that drove her actions, since it was largely an automatic, subconscious reaction.”
He gives an example of this common style of circular illogic:
Bad Decision:
“I’m going out and getting drunk with my friends.”
Resulting Consequences:
Drunken and unsatisfactory hookup sex with a stranger.
Hamster Processing Result:
“I was drunk and he took advantage of me or maybe even raped me! Maybe it was a date rape drug!”
Final Result:
“It’s not my fault.”
Elsewhere, Jagrmeister summarizes the effect as:
“Riding the carousel creates long-term psychological consequences in women and disagrees with their biological need for relationship security and stability — reducing their ability to pair bond with men, reducing their willingness to trust and love, forming animosity towards men, forming resentment towards their own sexuality, and increasingly viewing relationships as a hostile tug of war rather than a collaborative effort that both partners contribute to. Ironically, for all the abuse the modern woman subjects herself to in terms of giving up her sexuality for nothing in return, she develops an ‘alpha widow’ syndrome where she becomes eternally dependent on Alpha males to excite her sexually and believes that the beta males she must marry (since no alpha would) are a step-down and ‘concession prize’.”
Dr. Helen Smith words it this way:
“Ultimately, men know there’s a good chance they’ll lose their friends, their respect, their space, their sex life, their money and — if it all goes wrong — their family. Men aren’t wimping out by staying unmarried or being commitment-phobes. They’re being smart.” [Dr. Helen Smith, author of ‘Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood And The American Dream.’]
Here is Luther’s 1522 musing on the estate of marriage:
“To recognize the estate of marriage is something quite different from merely being married. He who is married but does not recognize the estate of marriage cannot continue in wedlock without bitterness, drudgery, and anguish; he will inevitably complain and blaspheme like the pagans and blind, irrational men. But he who recognizes the estate of marriage will find therein delight, love, and joy without end;”
Luther is suggesting that the ‘estate of marriage’ should not be as a prison but as an honour to care for children and provide for one’s spouse. He says that a carefree life is inappropriate. Treated incorrectly, marriage can be seen as a prison with bitterness. Treated correctly, the Christian marriage can give the male an important role in society. This was traditionally called: “being a good father.”
Luther even discusses the young males that play around which is covered by the modern expressions: “sowing their oats”; or “playing the field”; and later decide to settle down and marry.
“Many think they can evade marriage by having their fling for a time, and then becoming righteous. My dear fellow, if one in a thousand succeeds in this, that would be doing very well. He who intends to lead a chaste life had better begin early, and attain it not with but without fornication, either by the grace of God or through marriage. We see only too well how they make out every day. It might well be called plunging into immorality rather than growing to maturity.”
This is close to the promiscuity available to males because girls were told to say “Yes” by the feminists whence they proceeded to ride the ‘cock carousel’. Here are some illustrative comments:
Anonymous: “You cannot eliminate your sexual history to turn you into a ‘good girl”
Roosh: “I’ve had sex with many feminine women in Eastern Europe, and I can assure you that sleeping with just one of them surpasses sleeping with ten American or Scandinavian sluts who let me smash within the second hour of meeting them.” [27]
Roosh: “[Women] are vaginas, existing solely for an alcohol-fuelled pump that is wholly separate from emotion or human feeling.” [27]
Roosh: “What do we gain in intimacy with the modern American woman? What benefit is added to our character for learning how to jump through hoops for surreal porn sex with a girl who has been brainwashed to believe that women should no longer act like women and that you are the enemy?” [27]
Do we gain from the ability to have bizarre sex with a girl. He suggests that the girl has been brainwashed to believe that they should not act in a ‘feminine’ manner and that males are the ‘enemy’.
Anonymous Female: “One of my roommates hooked up with one guy, and then later that night had a threesome. So her record is four in one day. Which is a little intense for me, ...”
Roosh: “You strengthen their cause as you dehumanize sex and make it meaningless and insignificant, well removed from its biological and bonding purposes.” [27]
Your aim in reading this book is to work out how to bring a man to the altar, and move on to be the mother of a happy family. My aim is to get you a man and get the males back into the marrying mood. There is a common belief amongst men that it is the middle-aged women that are causing the mid-life divorces. It is believed by many that the women are throwing the males out when they are bored with the relationship. Whether this is correct is of little consequence. Thus we have a situation where the perceived behaviour of middle-aged females makes it very difficult for younger females to find marriage partners. Some state that: “Males are going on a marriage strike.” But this is not the case. Males are not ganging up and jointly refusing in an organized manner. It is not a ‘strike’. It is the individual males that are individually refusing. They are weighing up the situation and refusing to pop the question. Some say: “Men have a ‘marriage phobia’.” However, men are getting married but not to girls that claim they cannot ‘find a man’.
It is not uncommon to hear males make statements similar to: “I would get married, if I could find the right girl.” Even though I am male, I am on the side of the girls. The men will ‘bend with the wind’. If they don’t find a girl they ‘like and trust’ enough to marry, they will not marry. The task of the female is to generate enough trust, then encourage him to ‘pop the question’. Unfortunately, this is problematic. The task in this book is to marry the man. There is no point in the twenty-year-old girl having a twenty-year principled argument following published propaganda to arrive at forty and realize that the principles were counterproductive. As one sixty-year-old girl, with no family, said to my brother: “Why did this have to happen to me?” She had a thankless career, but no family. She had truly assumed that family would come her way. I am hinting at a change in your attitude. It is exceedingly popular to verbally run down males in the current era. If your attitude is: “men are assholes.”, he will subconsciously spot it with obvious consequences. Let us travel through some thinking.
Firstly, at the start of a new relationship, you need to make sure from the outset that this relationship is a precursor to marriage. Right from the first date, it must be clear that you are on a path to a happy family. One must ask: “How am I to achieve this?” Some emboldened women I know might straight out say: “Do you want to f**k me or marry me?” You girls are much more inventive at this than me. Maybe this is softer: “I could pick up a man to sleep with me any night. I am looking for a man to marry.” That has a hint that you might jump into the sack regularly. So perhaps: “Boys always want to sleep with me, but no way. I wish to find a man to marry me. Are you up to it?” You shall have to interpret this and find a better way. Every girl has to deal with this. Many girls act as unpaid prostitutes and they don’t even realize it. Some claim that promiscuity is putting prostitutes out of business. For males, sex was always expensive of his time, assets, or labour. The cost was a lifelong commitment to provide for a female and offspring. Women created a cartel where they refused to have sex unless the male married her on her conditions. Her stand was supported by her father, brothers, both families, the Church and society. Repercussions could be violent or fatal. Today, sex is cheap. A bottle of spirits, some sweet words and she is all his. The sexual revolution was no revolution, it took us back to the sexual promiscuity of twenty centuries past. Cheap sex changed everything. It broke the cartel and put the power back in the hands of the males. The entranced young girls broke the cartel that females had created. The female cartel on sex was so powerful that females avoided the workplace and pushed the men into work situations. Mothers would initiate the procedure and a young woman would continue the practice. As Tanika says:
“Children, dogs, and men, it’s all the same procedure.”
The girl gives the males the upper hand with none of the responsibility of a serious relationship. The males, that have the attributes that are appealing to females, get easy sex from girls with no commitment. If a male fits some shopping list of attributes that you demand, you can bet that he has slept with numerous girls in the room and next week he will sleep with most of the rest. He is a butterfly flying from one bed to the next. Since we became civilized, they gave women the right to say: “No”. Since the propaganda telling girls: “It’s your body. You can do what you want with it.” Women have been saying “Yes” more than has ever occurred in written history. So this is a female created problem. (Although one needs to consider that it was males that funded and organized the advertising propaganda!) On meeting a male, you must quickly discern whether he wants nooky or relationship. Intuition works better than logic. You will be dumping a lot of males. But stick to your principles. If you do not enunciate this clearly at the first meeting, you will be guilty of leading the man along. If he assumed that you were talking to him because you desired nooky with him, you have led him along. If you weaken and hop into bed, you will be classed as an “easy lay”. You will have a queue of males after the honeypot. The male will use any number of persuasive methods to get to the honeypot. The males that learn the skill at breaking through a female’s defence system are the males that the females fall into bed with most and they are the males that are most likely to desert you for the next good looking easy lay. Females fail to realize that males who can win them instantly will never cherish them. A skilled male can destroy your defences in seven minutes. He will change an outright refusal into an enthusiastic demand by you by tapping into your reptile instincts. Gentle caresses on your back, neck, arms, and torso may turn your human steadfastness into willingness by overriding your human logical defence mechanisms by his methodical application to your reptile system. Do not doubt that some males will be able to bypass your human decision to refrain from sex. In basic language, some males call this: “Overcoming ‘last-minute-resistance’ ”.
In a moment of total indiscretion, one male described a specific girl’s vagina and the way she reacted in bed. Will this man go and tell his mates that you were a ‘screamer’? I wonder if she ever got married! Could you imagine a male giving this information about a girl he might marry? It is the height of stupidity to go out with a male like this one. This type of male sees no value in you beyond having nooky. I do not like to think that you might be stupid enough to fall for these ‘superficial charmers’. We can thus assume that the best male to choose is the one that puts in the most effort to ‘win you over’. He is the one that will still be there when the times get tough. It is actually part of ‘The Secret’. The girl chucks a tantrum or two to check that he hangs around after the event.
Many of these ‘superficial charmers’ become so skilled that they will bed numerous women in a week. No force is required, just a woman to say: “Yes”. Men like to lay girls that say: “Yes”, but they would only marry a girl that says: “No”. Thus it is not a male fault as males prefer to have relationships with girls that say: “No”. Consider the logic. I am male. Why would I ever think of marrying a “Yes” girl? I might as well get ‘Stupid’ tattooed across my forehead. Here are some typical blog comments to give you an insight:
CH: “It’s just assumed that men alone are the sex abdicating their societal duty, that all women need to do is show up, no matter how broken, bedraggled and burdened with bastards, and men will feel an overwhelming urge to marry these unfeminine, spiteful ogresses and provide for them. Yeah right!” [1]
Anonymous: “Women aren’t women anymore”
CH: “Try not to fuck around so much. Men are not enthusiastic about marrying women whose vaginas have played host to numerous cocks before them.” [1]
William: “The old traditions weren’t to punish women but for society to function and made by wise men over generations. There will be no society in the future since these femicunts destroyed the traditional heritage and way of life for nothing. They are too damned stupid to see how birth rates play out in the long run.
And they reckon when the worlds African and Muslim its gonna be so much better or did they not think that far? Israel will have their expansionist state taking over the Middle East and what not. Europe and their fucking idiocy will be the new third world and hardly remembered. They had to look long-term and be cynical and see what was in front of them rather than refuse to see beyond that which there told was the official line.
Imagine if all the races were completely different!! This was believed before the whole subject was banned from being studied further! It’s not that we can prove otherwise just that we can ban further study and say that there are small amounts of doubt. We can then present that as though the evidence is that there are none, and then even deny that race exists, even though we know that we have hardly ever studied it and that to do so is really banned. ...
Whites problem is that they like to believe the official line and cannot stand against a social order. That is why they became so advanced because they worked together so well. That is also why they are destroyed.” [Return of Kings]
Our ancestors were not stupid. They did not have the internet and mobile phones but they had brains and used them. They instituted the ‘no sex before marriage’ policy for a reason. We need to reintroduce this policy. Under such a policy, even males would be happy to marry the first girl they slept with. However, it won’t happen in a hurry, so you have to operate in the fifty percent that do get married.
Males are going to categorize you, just as you categorize males. Males will class you as:
In simple male language, this is “Would” or “Wouldn’t”. You do not need to be perfect. His mind will tell him that the ‘perfect’ girl will receive too much competition from other males. I know. I have had this problem. The best-looking girls do not make the best girlfriends nor the best wives. Just look after yourself well enough to be attractive. Makeup and fake are to be avoided. Of the first group the male will classify you as:
1A and 1B do not depend on looks but on character and behaviour. Here, the male is deciding whether to bed you or marry you. I cannot work out whether this is a quick decision or whether the male works it out over minutes, days, months or years. But your aim is to be in class 1B.
Recapping: He must find your appearance attractive enough to want to bed you and must find your character attractive enough to want a relationship.
You will be classifying the males in a similar manner but you need to ensure that you are 1B in the male’s mind. You may have classified him as suitable marriage material, but if you are not ‘1B’, walk away. You have to be ‘marriage material’ to him and he has to be ‘marriage material’ to you. To a man, the female does not need to be a picture of perfection, but she has to be attractive enough so that he does not feel that he is missing out on better bodies. In fact, the male may actually avoid the best lookers for fear of constant attraction from other males and concern about his own attractiveness. Irrespective, do not have sex with the male until you are comfortable that he has honourable intentions. It appears that the best advice is no sex until marriage. Clearly, through history, women have weakened, but it was on the basis of: “If you get me pregnant, you marry me!” Historical sex before marriage was likely to be situations where ‘things happened’ in the heat of the moment between inexperienced young people. Part of the inexperience might be the girl not realising that her defences are prone to disappear when in a passionate embrace as would have happened in our reptile past.
To hell with what others tell you. Ignore phrases such as “Are you sexually repressed?” and “Lighten-up”.
When initially meeting a potential future husband, give him the space to do his ‘wooing’. He is a hunter. There is a chase involved. The chase can be more fun than the capture. Play the game. It is like the hide and seek games played as a child, although you may only be hiding your eyes from sight rather than your whole physical self. You play hide and seek with your eyesight so that he is tied up in knots trying to work out whether you are interested. You miss a few words so that he is not sure if you are interested, then you pay full attention. He is chasing you and you give him the chase of his life. But don’t forget that males are a little inhibited at present due to the onslaught against them. Too many girls brush off men in an inappropriate manner so some may have their wings damaged and fail to make an approach. There is also the problem that there are threats of harassment when males make approaches that are deemed unwanted by the recipient. They were not unwanted by the giver. But males have few rights when it comes to these things. Camille Paglia has this to say on the problem that males currently have over chatting to a girl:
“Men are suspicious of women’s intentions. Feminism has crippled them. They don’t know when to make a pass. If they do make a pass, they don’t know if they’re going to end up in court.” [17]
As reptiles, we did not speak. One-hundred-thousand years ago we did not have speech. On first meeting, if he is enthusiastic, he may babble nonsense, whereas the ‘butterfly’ that beds a new girl each week will have well-practiced pickup lines accompanied with an enticing fake smile. Whilst your potential husband babbles, give the interested nod every few seconds and say the occasional “Yes”. You are not after an intellectual conversation, you are after a father to your children. Potential fathers are few and far between. Your smile must say: “I am pleased with your attention.” Your body stance must present well. Do not try for logical conversations. Courting is reptilian in origin. It is the creation of an emotional connection. The whole of the courting process and the coupling process do not need words. Words get in the way. Use eye contact with a minor movement of your eyelashes and slight nods. Your breathing will cause your breasts to rise and fall. This will excite, but don’t make it too obvious. Flirting is emotional, not logical. Your speaking will destroy the situation. Show interest in his activities and his thoughts. If you have to say: “No”, do it gracefully. If you use harmful words, you are damaging the interests of other girls and society.
A blogger had this to say: “I have had extensive conversations with my current foreign girlfriend about raising a family and how her mom is willing to be grandma and baby-sit and the things needed for her sister for high school.” You need to learn from this foreign girl.
Particularly at the stage of moving in together, the respect of marriage must be clear. To a girl, moving in together is a step towards marriage, but to a male, it is a way to share costs with bonuses. I may seem that moving in together and marriage are the same, but this is not so. It is a significant stage in commitment for a male, but it is not marriage. He can escape in a moment. It is generally better not to move in until married.
The concept of marriage is needed for a stable society to give offspring a stable environment to bring up children. The stable loving marriage is also needed to teach the offspring the way that society functions. Anything other than stable marriage is a dead-end for society. Our continuance of civilization relies on the stable family unit. The children need to observe a happy family unit in operation.
It is essential that the minds of the two that are moving in together are running parallel on the movement to marriage and the reasons for marriage. Dating is a tryout for marriage. Moving in together gives males perks including more sex and less loneliness, however, he avoids what he sees as a petrifying commitment. Some say that moving in allows the couple to share part of their lives as a test run for marriage but the statistics don’t appear to support this line of thought. Marriage is saying that you intend to spend the rest of your life with one person and that you are prepared to face the tough times with the good. This then takes us to the items that will split the relationship. There will be differences. Compromises will be required. In reality, the characters of the two should grow together so that you can each finish off each other’s sentences. If every sentence is going to be a rivalry, you will fail. All decisions are for mutual benefit, not for your benefit. If you want everything your way, say goodbye to any relationship. You will get your way once you get pregnant through to the early years of childhood. He will eventually awake to his fatherly role when the child arrives and support is needed. The fatherly roll did not exist in early history so it is not tied into his DNA. For the male, it is mostly a learned skill. Motherhood skills are tied into your DNA. You will change when you bring a child into the world and the natural motherhood skills will manifest themselves. He will rely on your motherhood intuition for guidance. Don’t take advantage of this. You want him to still be there at the end of the child cycle. To be by your side willingly rather than grudgingly. There is a far higher chance of having problem children when there is no father present. So defer to him at every opportunity. The task is to get him to look after your interests and the interests of the family. To do this, he needs to take a leadership role. This is part of the reason why they made the male the ‘head of the family’. In the family situation, your skills are far higher. As the one endowed with the ability to impart care, you will rise to be the strongest of the pair. He will be physically stronger but in most other ways you will be stronger except on logic. Being lost in the situation, the man will follow your instructions. To correct the situation, our ancestors arranged for the male to be the ‘head of the family’. This has at least two advantages. Firstly, the male has the weaker position in the family as you will have greater influence over the children. By making the male the head of the family, at least ensures that decisions go through two heads. The Greeks have a saying: “The man may be the head of the family, but the woman turns the neck.” You will effectively have the stronger influence over decision making through your womanly ways. The man finishes up making a decision that favours the woman of his life. Secondly, men have simpler thinking processes. They do not clutter their decisions with emotion and unnecessary information. Their logic is clean cut in that it only looks at direct facts. They remove emotion and their personal wants from the decision making. If two males have a fight, when the fight is finished, one may say to the other: “Sorry mate! My error. It’s yours.” End of matter! The joke in male circles is: “If you have an argument with a woman, even if you are correct, she will get nasty.” Males learn not to argue with women because they will not win. To a male, arguing with a woman is a ‘lose-lose’ situation. You need to recognize this. He will soon cease to argue with you. This does not mean that you win the argument. It means you won because he knows that you will ‘ban sex’ for a fortnight. He knows that you will ‘get nasty’ if you lose the argument. The same occurs in a Slave-Master situation. It occurs in Boss-Employee relations. You must develop a more conciliatory approach to solving differences. Which is more important to you, maintaining his support or drowning his influence. You prefer to look at a mountain. The male wants to go and see what is on the other side of the mountain. You will easily crush his desire to venture to the other side. You will lose the excitement that he brings to the relationship and you will crush the very essence of what makes him a man. As a hunter-gatherer, your male wandered the forests. He ventured into strange lands. Getting lost was normal. He finds his way in strange intuitive ways. Ways that you may never understand. He has mechanisms to cope with the failure to catch the pig. “Stuff it! Never mind. I’ll find another pig.” or “Never mind! Better luck tomorrow.” In the words of my locksmith: “Either fix the problem or ‘flick it’.” He tells me that his wife revisits past problems. He does not.
I had another chat with a very clever girl that is a master at playing the emotions of males. I discussed how women control males by saying things such as: “Oh! You decide. Dear. You always make the best decisions. I am so lucky having you to look after me.” She agreed that this was the best way of controlling a man. In our discussion, I asked about arguments. I explained that we could not argue one-hundred-thousand-years ago because we had no language. So I asked whether I should write that a girl should avoid arguments. In a difficult answer, she agreed. She eventually said: “Yes. I agree.” What she was agreeing to was that there are better ways to control a male than arguing. I believe that the argument destroys part of the relationship for effectively no gain. I say “no gain” because you could have got the same result by playing his emotions. Some would say that this is conceding to the male, but if the male is doing what you wanted anyway, you are not conceding. Women, particularly young women, get what they want because they drop little hints and men get great joy giving to them. Two happy people. She got what she wanted and he enjoyed the giving and the recognition.
Manushi: “Women can control their urges and use sex as a manipulation. ... This is the reason why traditional cultures limit access to sex. ...We know what happens when you lift the rules.” [Return of Kings]
Your male will be opportunistic. He grabs opportunities when they arrive. He is inventive. But at the end of the day, he brings back the pig to his beloved wife who he trusts to be there with a welcoming smile. He will chase pigs through the forest in the pouring rain from dawn to dusk for one of your three-second smiles and a quick hug. He will put up with your ratty manners up to the point that you disrespect him. The marriage is in effect forcing a couple to rectify their relationship differences. Society and the family are fortified by the legal covenant called marriage. The twenty-three-year-olds often say to me: “Andy. We were brought up in the generation of broken families.” So your inability to maintain a relationship does not end when you divorce. The failure lives on in your offspring. It will modify their approach to relationships, marriage, and family. So you may have children when you are sixty-four but you may not be going to the Isle of Wight with the grandchildren.
Every stage of the early relationship should be a stage towards marriage. All gentle methods of persuasion need to be used on the male. Marriage has never been a natural institution. Marriage arrived with civilization. At the beginning of civilization, it was: “If you want her, you must marry her.” The weakening of the Christian religion has weakened the institution of marriage. Because marriage was not a natural institution, it is not embedded in the male reptilian brain. Nor is the mechanism to bring men to marriage embedded in the reptilian brain of the female. Marriage is an invention by society. Marriage is a tradition, not an instinct. The tradition is being broken by media propaganda. As one pastor said to me: “Television is Satan’s pulpit.” You need to make use of society to encourage him to the altar. Help should be given to you by his mother ... and his father. If it is not given, have a quiet word in the father’s ear. Also by your mother and father. Assistance should also be given by your married friends. Also by the local church. So part of a logical tactic is to move in the right circles. This might be a regular visit with him to your family. Ensure that he spends time alone with your mother. Ensure that he spends time ‘out’ with your father. Perhaps, get him invited out with your brothers. Make sure he meets your married friends. Make sure he gets on the ‘invite list’. You will, of course, have been going to church regularly as part of your image and also to find ‘Mr. Right’ and to demonstrate your support for the church’s stand on marriage. The Church is your weapon. All of these groups will encourage him to propose. The marriage between two people involves more than the two individuals. The families have interests at stake. Friends also care for your welfare. I notice that my mother looks after the spouses of her grown children with the utmost of diligence. She looks after them better than her own children. In reality, you are marrying his family, or at least you are marrying into his family. You will be called ‘sister-in-law’ by his brothers and sisters and they will instantly look after your interests. His father will say: “My daughter-in-law”. His mother will bring presents round to her ‘daughter-in-law’. If his family likes you, you are well on the way. I cannot understate the importance of your meeting with his family, particularly his mother. Meeting the mother is an incredibly important occasion and a milestone. They will directly ask him: “When are you getting married?” and they will not be tolerant of a negative answer. “She is a ‘nice’ girl. Marry her.” Could you ever have a better supporter than his mother? What male ever goes against his mother? If he lets you go, they will still be asking him in forty years time why he let that ‘good girl’ go. That ‘good girl’ is you. You will still be a topic of conversation in forty years time. I know from experience. My brother asked me the same question forty-two years after the event.
A girl, who we shall call Mary, was getting off my bus on a wine tour and said to me: “Andy. How can I compete with this?” From a previous conversation, I knew her message. She was a Christian girl and a regular church attendee. Mary believed the correct behaviour was for a girl to ‘keep her knickers on’ until marriage. She was referring to the problem of finding a male in the then present company whilst competing with girls that regularly had casual sex. What man is not going to try to get the bra off. The level of your resistance is up to you. One girl, Adena, said indignantly, when I was quizzing on one-night stands and general promiscuity: “What! First night. Kiss only. And at that, only a peck on the cheek.” Smart girl. She is now married with a growing healthy daughter. Back to Mary and her comment: “Andy. How can I compete with this?” She was referring to the problem of finding a boyfriend in an environment where girls were dropping their knickers on the first night, and girls were sampling many men. A change in environment may be needed.
When males say to me: “Andy. Where do we find ‘good girls’?” I say ballroom dancing and church. However, both of these are likely to have a surfeit of eligible women. However, if you are already a regular churchgoer, bring your man along, it may give him the marriage idea.
Yell and scream that the male writing this book should dare to have an opinion on things female. If you want a book full of man-hate, read a different book. Destroying men is a fairly straightforward task. Somebody writing as OuiCrudites created this list which someone titled:
Evil Seven-Step Plan to Destroy Men
“Step 1: Tell boys that they are disruptive and inferior to the girls in their classes.
“Step 2: Once a boy reaches puberty, assume that he is a potential rapist and woman batterer. Also, assume his female contemporaries can do no wrong.
“Step 3: Tell pubescent male that he must be a perfect gentleman and repress anything that makes him masculine if he wants females to like him. Shame him when he happens to notice that females throw themselves at his most aggressive male classmates. Tell the females they can do no wrong.
“Step 4: Throw zillions of female-only scholarships and hiring quotas at young adult females. Tell her that she is a helpless victim that can do no wrong. Assume the young adult man is a rapist woman oppressor looking for victims.
“Step 5: Smile and nod while some females mate with the roughest thugs they can find, and give them welfare. Browbeat all males for not ‘manning up’.
“Step 6: Allow some wives to ruthlessly tear apart their families for non-dire reasons. Withhold children from loving fathers. But of course, continue to demand child support.
“Step 7: Ignore and shame men who fall on hard times. Act surprised when they hold a gun to their head and pull the trigger.”
We need to look at what characteristics are going to help you win your man. No fakery allowed. No lying. No misleading tactics.
For your man to commit to you, he has to find characteristics in you that are irresistible. He consciously or subconsciously wants a girl that will be a good wife and an excellent mother to his children. He has to be comfortable in your presence. He needs to know that you will love him even when he is not at his best. Demonstrate to those around him that you value him under all circumstances. Does it really matter how the toothpaste is squeezed? In conflict, only discuss the behaviour, never attack the person. Do not damage his dignity. Do not disrespect him. His dignity is as important to him as your dignity is important to you. Never lie. Never ever lie. You don’t need to tell the whole ugly truth, but never lie. Trust is crucial. Friendship is needed, but it may have a totally different character to a regular friendship. Laughter is important for a relationship. Your male wants to know that he can play with you, lay with you, and share his hopes and dreams with you. When you get married, there will be a change in thinking. He and you will be encouraged to make whatever changes are necessary to stay together. I am not suggesting that one should tolerate abuse. With males, it is prone to be physical abuse and with females, it is prone to be emotional abuse. He may not be coming home because he finds the home environment unpleasant. Perhaps he is driving home thinking: “Back to the house of misery!” His behaviour may be in response to your activity or behaviour. You may have turned sex into a chore or duty. You may be belittling things he says. The other day, I had a conversation with a very strong woman about a paragraph of this book. She said: “I don’t agree with that”. She had done the same the day before. She paused after saying: “I don’t agree with that” and said almost the same thing that I had said. I felt like I was not allowed to have an opinion. I thought: “Glad I’m not married to her.” I reversed the conversation and probed her mind on the relationships between instinct, intuition, thoughts, feelings, and emotions. Perhaps you might like to ponder the difference between these five. They are all part of your thinking system. Why does the feeling that you get when you have done something wrong differ from the thought that you have done something wrong? You may be perpetrating emotional abuse and not realize it. Belittling your male is emotional abuse. Making him feel inadequate is emotional abuse. A hint that you might leave is emotional abuse. Emotional abuse can be as destructive as physical abuse. It can severely impact mental health. There is a false assumption that it is males that abuse women. Males may be more prone to inflict physical abuse whilst women are prone to inflict emotional abuse. The man is whisked off to jail very rapidly for physical abuse. Evidence suggests that women and men abuse each other at similar rates. I shall list a few items of emotional abuse. Do not use these tactics on your man. It is extremely unfair to attack the male in ways from which he cannot protect himself:
Emotional abuse can have devastating effects on the mental health and wellbeing of partners and children, including males.
Although the chapter was called “Marriage Shy Men”, it was really about how to get the man to marry you. So far I have discussed how not to put him off marriage by adjusting any inappropriate behaviour on your part. I have also discussed how to ensure that he is aware that you and he are on a path to marriage.
You need to establish a deadline. If the male does not commit within, say, six months, move-on and pay no attention to the excuses. However, the act of moving on, or even threatening to move on, will trigger a change of mind. You will be forcing him to commit or vanish. The thinking is: “One day, I would like a family. I am going to make a move in that direction. I like you tremendously and you will someday make a great father, but it is a time for me to make a bold step.” However, if you do move out, lay low for a while. Do not make an idiot of yourself at drunken parties. Do not be tempted into the beds of other men. Make sure he knows where to find you. He may come back to you, begging you to marry him. You are playing cat and mouse. Your male has a ‘pursuit’ built into his DNA. He will chase you around the world with only one thing on his mind........: You.
Males are prone to run away at the four-year point on the timeline. During the first four years, males have a primeval characteristic where they became besotted with the female. The term ‘besotted’ suggests an element of blindness to your faults. I call this besotted nature: “The Love Drug”. During this time, an image of you will come up in the front of his mind every twenty minutes or so during the day with an accompanying pleasant feeling. It is a good feeling. After four years, this ceases. After four years, he will look at you and say to himself: “How on earth did that happen?” He is likely to show increased signs of belligerence. If this coincides with decreased interest by yourself, he will implode and disappear. You need to be particularly careful at the four-year mark on the relationship timeline. The girl becomes practical about the relationship much earlier. My research tends to suggest a figure of eighteen months. The girl will have decided that this man is ok for her and that she is happy to spend her life with him. The danger time arrives at four years when he goes through his searching stage. If he lasts until five years or more, you have a good chance. He has got through his questioning stage and decided that he can live with you on a more practical level. But five years is a long time to wait for a proposal. If you went out with a male from twenty to twenty-five and parted, how long is it going to take to find another man — and how long will it take to get this man to say: “Will you marry me?” The girl has a similar issue when she reaches middle age. She is prone to say: “I can manage without him. I don’t need him. I am bored with him.” A destroyed relationship of twenty-five years is far more damaging than a destroyed relationship that occurs before marriage and children. This is not a one-sided issue. The mid-life breakup is even encouraged by woman’s magazines with banners such as this one on my desk: “How do other women have better sex?”
Many young males are stepping out of society altogether and the number doing so is increasing. They are avoiding relationships with females. They have increasingly turned to video games, mates culture, addictions, and pornography. This isolates them from a social environment which they see as debasing for males and which they perceive was created by the modern female. In reality, those that control the media had a large influence on the matter. In half my lifetime, the media of the ‘West’ has demoted men from a respected position in society, where they were expected to be providers and protectors of the family, to irrelevant fools. In the sitcoms, soapies, and commercials, males are commonly portrayed as the incompetent husband who is significantly outclassed by a smart and capable wife. Soapies often portray women as the hero, whilst they add little of value to society and simply make ignorant anti-male comments. If you watch these programs, please stop. They are poisonous. You may start using their rhetoric. If the male does not do as you require, you will echo the prepared line: “Men are immature” When men want to have fun: “Men are childish.” If they avoid marrying you: “Men are commitment-phobes.” I enjoy doing things, having fun, and avoiding repressive control. The night before I started this journey across Eastern Europe by train, I was chasing around the local park late at night on my electric drift trike. You are welcome to try call this sixty-six-year-old male a “childish, immature, commitment-phobe” and I’ll give you a run for your money with some juicy comments that may bring you to scream-at-male mode. We get quite used to the so-called modern-woman trying to poke both our eyes out at once with her second-hand attack phrases. In reality, why would any young male every want to get married? Marriage has become a legal contract where the female can opt out whilst the male is required to provide for her regardless. Females will have to fight for a better deal for discarded males if they want males to marry in any great number.
Some women are getting married. Some men are getting married. Some men are not marriage-shy. Let us be hard and look at why you are not walking down the aisle. Let us assume that the problem is you. The problem is not men because some are getting married. The problem is you. You are doing something wrong. You need to change. You must choose a man that is the ‘marrying type’. Somehow, you need to choose a man that is looking for a girl to marry, a girl like you. This is very specific. You must narrow it right down to those interested in marriage. Some girls can work it out. Some girls can ‘sniff’ it out. Some girls can detect it by instinct.
Once you have identified your man, you must make him fall in love with you to the extent that he will propose. You must create an emotional connection that he has never felt before. This is not done with words but by emotional connection. You don’t fawn over him. You make him fight for you in a game of emotional hide-and-seek the likes of which he has never experienced.
Males will enthusiastically sleep with any girl that is attractive to them, but will only marry the type of girl they feel comfortable taking home to their mother. I said mother and not father because the mother is a very larger figure in the male’s life. The mother gave guidance and care before he could care for himself and thus the young male is guided by the opinions of the female called mother. When you get taken home to meet his mother, you are well on the way to marriage. This mother-visit day is more important than the day you met him. She has more sway over him than you do at this stage. This meeting will be scary. Do a search on the internet for: ‘meeting his mother’.
Thus, the prime requirement is that you have to be the type of girl that gets taken home to meet his MOTHER. He is transitioning from influence from his mother to influence from you. Men always were influenced by females. It is where this statement came from: “Behind every strong man, there is a strong woman.” Whether that woman is his mother or you, is up to you. In the words of:
Camille Paglia (born 1947): “Male mastery in marriage is a social illusion, nurtured by women exhorting their creations to play and walk. At the emotional heart of every marriage is a pietà of mother and son.”
Girls should not sleep with a man on the night of meeting for various reasons. Males are programmed to spread seed. This has the effect of producing offspring, but because of our origin as a reptile, and the comparatively late arrival of the neocortex, the male does not look upon it as ‘making babies’. His mind is ‘let’s get this laid’. On the first day, lust is dominant. When he has taken you out for a few days, he will develop a more of a caring attitude. He will shortly start to call you ‘his’ girlfriend as in ‘possession’ — like owning a bicycle. However, you will also start to call him ‘your’ boyfriend, again indicating possession.
There would also have been a time when girls did not relate sex to offspring. In nature, males would naturally spread as much seed as possible which equated to sleeping with females and disappearing as rapidly as possible. However, the male might also choose the alternative and hang around to ensure a quality upbringing of the offspring. Some call this the Quantity versus the Quality system of spreading seed. You either produce large numbers of offspring or you produce a smaller number of quality offspring. Thus the male will ‘one-night stand’ as often as possible under the ‘Quantity’ Theory of reproduction or he will stay with one partner during the birth cycle under the ‘Quality’ Theory of reproduction. The choice is his at present with so many ‘yes’ girls being available for short-term-sex. If short-term-sex is unavailable due to custom, then he will choose a long-time partnership. Where both options are available, he will only choose long-term if there is a good chance that it will be long-term. He has to be certain that his potential partner is going to sleep exclusively with him. Thus the desire for ‘good’ girls — girls that say “No”. The reality is that most of the social problems involving sexual behaviour in the young would be eliminated if we lived in a society where males demanded the virginity of a girl before they would accept them in marriage. This would recreate the female cartel where girls would refuse sex before marriage.
Marriage was never compulsory for males. This blogger words it elegantly in a way that encapsulates his feelings on the matter:
“I really don’t wanna come off like a misogynist, but I respect a woman more if she doesn’t just put out straight away. It’s down to trust and I don’t think I could trust a girl who would just sleep with me the first time we meet to not do the same with others.”
This blogger suggests similar:
“I never married because I could never find a woman that I could trust.”
And some more man to man advice from that man called:
Anonymous: “It’s simple: ‘you can’t make a ho a housewife.’ ” [8]
A blogger by the name of ScipioAfricanus on PrisonPlanet claims that men are avoiding marriage for the following reasons:
1. Maturity. They are simply not men.
2. Finances. Many men cannot afford marriage. High taxes, inflation, and a tough job market kill all motivation. Some men feel it’s better to live in a studio apartment.
3. Family Court Laws which inevitably puts child support and alimony over the man’s head. [Prison Planet]
A forty-five-year-old single male sums the activities of the ‘modern woman’:
“I’m forty-five and single and all the over thirty-five-year-old former skanks want to be a part of my success, a part of my half million dollar home, and my freedom. Funny how they even tell me that they used to ‘eat men alive’ when they were younger and now they’ve ‘matured’. Reality is their power diminished and it’s hard for them to nail down a guy.” [Return of Kings]
Poison Soul: “Where are the feminine, classy women? Nowhere to be seen. Where are the slutty, brassy women? Puking in the gutters every Thursday through Saturday night.”
Anon: “Women have no innate sense of right and wrong, so there is no level they won’t sink. Us millennial guys noted this when younger when we learned ‘the best way to attract girls is to have one already’.” [12]
Young man in Australia: “More than half my friends in school didn’t have fathers, and although it wasn’t quite as bad as one or two per class, there were several girls I knew who were pregnant before fifteen. Some of them even knew who the father was... occasionally. Heck, one of my female friends had three children by the time she was sixteen, and all to different fathers. Whatever goodwill I had for women ended in high school. I’ve had a few girlfriends since then, hoping I’d find one that wasn’t crazy, but they all are.
Women are emotional vampires.
Women don’t have any social currency left.” [12]
Anonymous: “She will have kids, so don’t worry about her on that score. Only ... 38% of them will not be yours.”
Anonymous: “I am not interested in the women in Canada any longer too demanding and bitchy.”
Anonymous: “What we don’t like is how so many women have abandoned their sense of femininity, dress like slobs, and behave like pigs.”
Anonymous: “She cheated on me. With my best friend. The last text message I had received from her that day after a lovely argument involving me getting smacked in the face, stated: ‘Don’t be surprised when I fuck your friend.’ And little did I know, she wasn’t lying, and it wasn’t unplanned.”
Aazav: “If you’ve ever lived in California, you’d know a dozen friends who got married, then divorced and their ex-wives are collecting alimony while living with their new boyfriend.” [8]
Male Blogger: “I would not date a girl who is going nowhere in her life and has no plan.”
Here is Interviewee talking about the difference between a ‘Hook up’ and a ‘Date’:
“Hook up — can’t wait to tell your friends you fucked her.”
“Date — can’t wait to tell your friends you met her.” [7]
Addiction to sex:
Anonymous: “Sex is a hell of a drug.”
Man: “Three questions to consider when you’re considering wifing a girl:
Is she nice to you and does she do nice things for you?
Is she a virgin?
Does she come from a two parent household or one that espouses traditional values?
Three yeses means you’ve got a good girl, 2 yeses means your taking a mild to significant risk, 1 yes means you will be very broke and in debt within ten years, 0 yeses means your an idiot for considering that succubus.”
Anonymous: “Date material on the other hand, ... is a girl who is creative, intelligent, fun, sweet, interesting, etc. — all the things my girlfriend is.”
Interviewee: “The girl I want to date makes me a better person.” [7]
Interviewee: “You want to sleep with both. You only want to wake up next to one.” [7]
Anonymous: “There was a time when wives respected their husbands. There was a time when wives took care of their husbands as they expected their husbands to take care of them.”
Kev: “You can tell if it’s an act, by looking at her family. If her parents have a dysfunctional relationship or are divorced, good luck, you’ll need it. If her family is stable and happy, on the other hand, then she’s probably not pretending. That’s why it’s important to only marry a woman from a good family.” [8]
Young Male: “As an under thirty millennial, I will tell you exactly why most of us have this outlook. We are the divorce generation. Even if we grew up in families that weren’t divorced we were still latchkey kids. Not only did I, a little over a decade ago, have more friends with single mothers by choice but also with divorced parents than intact families I also went to school with girls and came of age during the girl power of the nineties.
This idea of women as victims falls on deaf ears when you spend year after year dealing with fucking cunts. Team vagina can tell me all day long about how women would never lie about birth control or use men for child support and so on. But, I know better. The high school I went to, a little over a decade ago, had a Teen Mom or two in almost every single class I had. I only had one class in high school that didn’t have a pregnant girl in it. Several had two or three, out of thirty or thirty-five students. That is just high school. Who needs to burn their own hand to find out that fire is hot when you can watch dozens upon dozens of older men burn their hands and scream in pain? This doesn’t even begin to talk about growing up in a feminized education system or the entitlement issues run rampant that most young women have or all the other issues. To put it simply: You can’t kick a dog and not expect it to eventually bite the hand that feeds. Guys of my generation have been kicked since we were puppies, and we were kicked constantly and by everyone who supposedly loved and cared for us.
There is a groundswell of MRAism and misogyny and just a lot of pissed off guys for one reason or another. I haven’t, for example, met a single guy in his twenties who hasn’t had at least one or more psycho bitch crazy ex-girlfriends. There is a reason that guys on Reddit have a saying that goes like this: “don’t stick your dick in crazy.”
There is also a reason that feminists have gotten so angry over young men and what young men say ... They are a perfect example of the crazy cunts that guys like me have had to deal with growing up. They have no argument or ability to even discuss topics, they simply mock and jeer. ...
The simple truth is that I ... get tired of the constant competitiveness and bitchy demeanor of western women. Especially the hyper-educated (with liberal arts masters) who want to rub it into our faces constantly.
Unlike men of older generations, I have had more girlfriends than most older guys had in their entire lives before I turned twenty-one. I can honestly say that women do not add any value, outside of the value of pussy and sex, to a man’s life. Even with great sex, it gets ****** old, it wears you down and makes you tired, having to constantly deal with the power struggles in modern relationships. I haven’t even lived with a girl and I am sick of it. After I got out of my longest LTR (long-term relationship) a few years back, it only lasted about three years, I was just drained. It felt like my soul had been sucked out or something. Women aren’t companions these days. They are ruthless competitors at work, at school, and even in our relationships. Why would I or any other guy ... give one [damn] about women?
... To be honest, I wouldn’t have even done that. The last thing I want to deal with is a false rape claim.
Women have [destroyed] any goodwill [males] my age used to have towards them. If you don’t believe me then simply look at markets and see what sells to young men and see how young men view women. Go and look at online forums based around video games and you will see young men talking shit about girls their age. Hell, get on some feminist sites and you will see feminists complaining about young guys, teenage guys, talking constant shit about women. Look at Reddit and you will see it too. Look at any male-oriented areas and you will see it. Look at rap music or the proliferation of the word gold digger. Women are worthless these days ... I think they are realizing it too. There is no happy ever after. There is no ‘till death do us part’, cause we all know that women are branch swingers or monkeys. They won’t let go of one branch until their hands are firmly planted on another branch. Oh, and branch equals cock. Females tend to call it serial monogamy. ... They won’t love you. They will just treat you as a utility object. An ATM or sperm donor ... or a dildo or a rock to lean on and so on.
My point is this. What do women have any more??? Pussy is cheaper to come by, especially if you know some game.... They can’t cook or clean worth shit. They are (dis)honest. ... What do women have to offer besides a funhole to play with for forty-five minutes? They suck as friends, they give their own friends eating disorders and call them ‘frenemies’.
WTF do women have to offer? I think it is very little and I think young men are figuring this out every day. I think women are realizing that their gravy train is coming off the tracks and are scared. I think many, if not most, young men wouldn’t allow a woman to go back to the kitchen and be barefoot even if the women begged for them to be allowed to be kept. I think women know this and I think that is why they are getting even more bitchy. I think this will only backfire for women as a whole ...” [13]
I know that is hard to take but consider the line:
“I think many, if not most, young men wouldn’t allow a woman to go back to the kitchen and be barefoot even if the women begged for them to be allowed to be kept.”
There was the complaint that males kept women barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. He is saying that males would not even trust current girls to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. This suggests that he considers that the current situation is irreversible.
Males read items like this next one online. This makes it very difficult for males to trust females:
One Revelator: “Casual sex has already been normalized. No marriage required. ‘Hooking up’ and being ‘friends with benefits’ is the new norm.” [Prison Planet]
Anonymous: “I want to date the girl my mom would be proud of. I want to fuck the girl my mom would be appalled at.”
Nebojssha: “I found a woman like that, I will marry her that instant.” [8]
donnay: “Breaking up the family unit has been an agenda for a very long time. Lots of women have been brainwashed by Rockefeller sponsored Feminist Movement, Madison Ave, and Hollywood.” [Prison Planet]
Geniocrat: “Fortunately this new woman in my life is non-American so she has had none of the feminist brain-washing.” [Prison Planet]
Blogger: “ ‘Free love’ was about promoting promiscuity, division, and divorce amongst other things.” [Prison Planet]
Prison Planet: “A marriage requires a certain level of trust from both parties as well as a certain level of commitment to contribute to the marriage. If one person or the other bails in favor of personal gain, then the marriage cannot stand.
Then the family unit cannot stand.
Then the neighborhood/town/city/state cannot stand.
Then the nation collapses.
At that point, all the feminist ideology won’t matter anymore.” [Prison Planet]
One Revelator: “But we have been subject to social engineering for several generations now and the older generation that remembers the ‘how to’ is dying. Girls have been taught to rely on the state for their security. Boys are being taught that it’s better never to get married. Both are encouraged to be promiscuous, to separate sex and love. Both are being indoctrinated that gay marriages are normal. And, as such, the word ‘marriage’ is being systematically redefined as the old meaning simply gets phased out. The focus has turned to hedonistic self-satisfaction rather than the realization of a higher purpose. Commitment isn’t recognized. Fidelity isn’t recognized. Self-sacrifice isn’t recognized. Service isn’t recognized.” [Prison Planet]
One Revelator: “Post WWII saw the creation of the nuclear family via smaller housing being made available for returning veterans. This effectively reduced the size of the family living under one roof. Thus it reduced the amount of support that multiple generations living under one roof could provide. ... Multi-gen houses tend to have a strong reliance on and love for each other. Whereas the more broken families end up turning to the state and learn to love big brother’s constantly shifting, cold, and impersonal policies.” [Prison Planet]
Aaron Russo: “Feminism was created to destabilize society, tax women, and set up the NWO.” [19]
Blogger: “Hollywood producer, filmmaker, activist and truth seeker Aaron Russo reveals some of the REAL reasons for feminism which was funded and pushed by the Rockefellers and the CIA for very nefarious reasons, which includes being part of their central banking worldwide takeover to help set up the New World Order.”
Anonymous: “Shouldn’t we (as a society) be encouraging anyone who WANTS marriage to GET married??”
One Revelator: “Where do young men and women get their instruction about how to be a good father or mother, husband or wife? The media sure as hell isn’t going to tell them. Movies stop once a couple has sex as if it’s the be-all-end-all. Sometimes they continue but only focus on the dysfunctional.” [Prison Planet]
Anonymous: “As for the value of virginity, historically it’s a reflection of social values and self-control which are beyond important in marriage and child-rearing ...” [8]
My 2 Cents: “A close friend of mine was divorced by his wife. She first cheated on him with another man. She then initiated the divorce. He begged her to try marital counseling and wanted desperately to save their marriage. She refused. They went to divorce court. The judge awarded his wife full custody of their two children and ninety percent of my friends assets. This story makes me quite wary of marriage with a threat like this hanging over your head.”
This is a common theme in male blogs. Males are increasingly aware that as soon as a male gets a girl pregnant and irrespective of whether she lied about birth control, the hostile justice system ensures that the male becomes her indentured servant for the rest of his life.
Invalidity: “Most of those males have become disillusioned by marriage through countless divorces, child support and alimony payments, and the unmet expectations that they held when they were growing up.” [8]
Anonymous: “Never mind the reality that men have ZERO custody rights when they have a child out of wedlock and are then required to spend thousands of dollars on court and attorney fees for a custody trial, submit to drug and psychological testing, pay for supervised visitation service, etc if they want to be in the child’s life.
C’mon men! Don’t you want to throw away fistfuls of dollars to fight for custody in a system biased against you on top of the child support you’re already paying?”
JP: “They ignore the fact that, depending on the survey, 70-90% of divorces are initiated by women, with the number one reason given being ‘irreconcilable differences’, i.e., ‘she’s not haaaaaapy’.”
DontTellAnyone: “Women have changed all over this country. There is simply no incentive for a woman to stay in a marriage anymore. The system has made it too easy for a female to bail when things don’t go their way. Men don’t stand a chance.” [1] [2]
Anonymous: “I see no effort to change these horrible divorce laws that destroy men...” [14]
enticingasthatmaybe: “The women initiating divorce stat doesn’t take into account at least one situation. My wife walked out on our marriage because, unhaaappppy. However, I hired a lawyer first and initiated the legal divorce. So even though she ended the marriage, I actually initiated the divorce.” [7]
Anonymous: “He was going bankrupt because of TWO alimony payments.” [8]
vengefully_yours: “Nope. It’s why I got a vasectomy. After the first wife took my kids one day and moved 1500 miles away, then the state garnished 70% of my gross pay leaving me four percent to live on, I knew not to have any more kids. Living on $100-$300 a month isn’t easy, and in the military being unable to live on base it means living in a car or on friends couches. Homeless while serving my country, and being actively prevented from talking to my kids, and passively prevented from seeing them because I couldn’t afford to travel to see them was enough to make me get out of the gene pool.” [7]
A: “In may of next year, I am done paying her. Never again.” [7]
M: “Not to be so much of a special snowflake myself my mother tried that with me. She cheated on her faithful, hardworking and pretty ‘alpha’ husband, got caught, broke up, divorce-raped him over falsified police charges for domestic violence and then shortly after got dumped by her lover too. Spent the next three years trying to tarnish his reputation on things he had done or said, I was old enough to piece together several contradictions in what she said versus how it went down. That usually turned into me being called ‘ungrateful’ or ‘You’re just like him’ etc. Had I been younger?” [8]
Colovick: “Now the institution is meaningless and women see it as a way to get everything they want from it and keep all the advantages whether the man stays or goes.” [8]
Jailed: “In the worst case scenario, will involve losing your assets and your children, and being thrown in prison.”
Male: “What security is there for men in marriage? If I cheat on my wife, she gets half my s**t. If she cheats on me, she still gets half my s**t. Why the f*** should I get married?”
Feminism is a recipe for male suicide:
#1: “I started asking in my little circle and I found seven male suicides related to being in a relationship with a feminist.” [Prison Planet]
Tanveer Ahmed, psychiatrist: “What I see clinically is men often find the Family Court extremely difficult, it is one place where all manner of accusations are accepted until disproven. Their identity as a father in particular often takes a battering. The concept of innocent until proven guilty does not apply here.” [18]
Aisrap: “nearly a quarter of men who die by suicide have experienced relationship separation, making them four times more likely to suicide than separated women.” [Australian Institute of Suicide Research and Prevention (AISRAP)]
Corrine Barraclough: “Anti-men messaging from fierce feminist organizations and anti-male policy is not helping our male suicide crisis. Deny that? You’re denying the truth.” [16]
Christopher Mackney: “I could fill a book with all the lies and mysterious rulings of the Court.”
Deleted: “I’ve experienced, seen, and understood enough to decide to never marry.” [8]
Canadian: “I will never get married and have no interest in Canadian women. Too materialistic and I hate fake everything.”
No Way Jose!: “If someone put a gun up to my head today and said I must be ‘mature’ and marry, I would die without a second thought. Real men don’t trade their ideals for anything and will do whatever it takes to accomplish them and, if they don’t receive an acknowledgement, they will let the world burn.” [10]
Dreauxx: “I decided just last year that marriage and the typical ‘status-quo’ relationship schemes are not and never will be a part of my life; for these exact reasons. Who in their right mind, is going to sign up for getting bitched at, blamed, and utterly used by this majority of ‘women’ who just HAVE to have this sense of authority. Why put yourself through all of that, when you could live your life to the fullest living for yourself and no one else. I know there’s still good ladies out there. Ones who know how stupid this feminist wannabe crusade is... I don’t think the chances of finding a girl like that ... I’ve just given up completely with it all, dating as a whole. I have completely accepted that I am okay on my own, free to see who I want, when I want, and to do whatever I want with them. In a way, it’s a shame it has to come to that, because I’ve always imagined myself as someone who could be an outstanding partner...” [8] [Bad language removed]
Dreauxx: “There are no promises, despite those vows. At any given second of any day, she could just snap on you. And quite frankly, I’m not okay with living my life walking on pins and needles waiting for my heart to be imploded because I was gullible enough to believe I could trust it to someone.” [8]
Tsotha: “You can’t bank on the ideal, but she can certainly bank on the family court system.” [8]
Dreauxx: “Absolutely I’d love to spend my life with a woman who can fit my needs, and one whose needs I can satisfy as well.” [8]
Blankworry: “I’m living here in Russia and we don’t have this problem. Women want to be married, they want to take care of their husbands and they want to have all of those good qualities that make marriage a valuable and desirable thing.” [8]
ScipioAfricanus: “Hence the quandary if you are a man:
1. You do not marry for fear of child support, alimony and bitter divorce and custody battles which sucks your assets. Because of this, the NWO wins because you intentionally chose not to reproduce and educate offsprings which can fight them.
2. You actually get married but are sucked into the 50% divorce rate. Your savings get used up in custody and divorce battles. You end up paying child support. Your bitch of an ex-wife have your kids and she educates them in statist public schools and your children become a member of the NWO.” [Prison Planet]
Marriage is essential for civilization.
N3vertheless: “Red Pill’s truth is that feminism has destroyed traditional relationships. That the destruction of religious constructs has actually damaged the family unit and allowed women’s hypergamy to run freely. Many subscribers to this subReddit lament the destruction of traditional society and even recommend marrying women from more traditional cultures.
As for lifesitenews being against ‘sexual truth’, they rant against promiscuity (which has been enabled by the pill) but the only reason that the Red Pill recommends promiscuity is because female hypergamy has been unleashed, not because it makes society better.” [8] [hypergamy is defined as the action of marrying a person of a superior caste or class.]
EA: “How can a woman expect to have a future with a man if women systematically destroy men?” [9]
Male: “I do wonder sometimes if the destruction of the old American nuclear family has gone too far? ...”
“Pastors, Preachers, Marriage Registry offices all report record low levels of marriage and the ones who do marry are getting older and older... Men seem to be opting out of the whole tie-the-knot and fatherhood thing, they are portrayed in the news and in movies and shown in TV sitcoms as a kind of a joke. Also in breakups, mostly Courts will favor the woman and the man will lose A LOT OF INCOME. Many who don’t pay support go to jail, for example over 90% of those punished, sent to jail for not paying child support are men. The Consequences of the current American society is men are not marrying the American Woman. ...
Westerners, American men, many who still want to marry they now marry a girl from India, Russia, Cambodia, fly over and get a bride from China, Bolivia, Peru....yet they avoid the American woman ...
The traditional ‘Man’ role in the USA has been dying ...
So many people have told me how Men are fed up with American women or western woman and why men don’t want to marry the American woman anymore. ...
A satisfied, content and happiness gender gap has also emerged across all ethnic groups for women, in America. All women are now unhappy compared to men”[Grammar corrected for clarity.]
Eyesfrontmen: “Women will never accept responsibility for their behavior. Any explanation of society that contains the idea that women can or will ever be responsible is based upon an unsound premise, and if adopted, will dissolve society.” [11]
The Man: “Men are simply making a mature, rational decision. The costs of dating, being with, marrying, or even talking to a woman far exceed the benefit.” [10]
Anonymous Male said: “So Mr. Decent Guy stays without a girlfriend throughout his twenties into his thirties while the Alphas, thugs and bad boys clean up. Mr. Decent Guy becomes disillusioned with women and drops out of dating. What happens to the women who rejected him? They ride the Alpha male carousel through their twenties at the height of their attractiveness. They get booted off the carousel, unmarried around age thirty when they reach the cut off age. That’s when they panic and seek a provider — you know, decent nice guys that they rejected by the boatloads when they were younger. Only Mr. Decent Guy doesn’t want them. I have seen this time and time again.” [14]
Anonymous Male said: “They know what’s happening and they are angry ... but will hold onto their privilege till every child, chivalry, and marriage is completely dead ... and no men in sight till they wise up and change the divorce and criminal laws ...” [14]
Female Blogger: “... if I was a man in this day and age, I would be quite put off marriage to many of the modern women in the Western world.” [15]
Tamerlame: “Only 16.4% of women exclusively breastfeed their children.” [11] [20]
Anonymous: “Men are tired of being told that if a woman is not happy, it’s the man’s fault.”
Anonymous: “Feminism teaches women to think of men as the enemy. It has made women “angry” and “defensive” and often unknowingly so.”
Josh: “The whole double standard of women wanting a strong man, but then if you rise up, defend yourself and maybe even win, you are this horrible person for doing that to a girl.” [8]
Dreauxx: “...brainstorm up these stupid ideals and make men out to be an overpowering enemy. Wanna play that game, baby? Have a GREAT time making it on your own then. Because I can sleep quite comfortably alone at night, and we all know these ‘women’ who are doing all this fighting are internally screaming for attention and are craving affection from men.” [8] [Bad language removed.]
Male: “We are real men when we coldly analyze the big picture and choose to do our part in making it better, and when we set our mind like that, we are simply unbreakable and only death will stop us.” [10]
Man: “Nature made up the rules. A male was meant to impregnate as many females as possible, then move on, simple.”
A Man: “Men in college are choosing to date off campus so that they won’t be the victim of the campus false rape industry.”
A Man: “Young men, who aren’t stupid, will choose ‘no sex with human women until graduation’ since that will be the only way for men to protect themselves from the campus false rape industry. ...
VR (Virtual Reality) sex can also provide alibis to men falsely accused of rape by women they never had sex with since the VR sex system can log when it is being used. ...
Young men will ask themselves if women couldn’t be trusted not to make false rape accusations in college, why would they be trustworthy later? Thus the effect of “no sex with human women until graduation” extends beyond college even if a man occasionally has sex with human women. This is what nobody is talking about when it comes to VR sex (or sex bots), and it’s a greater threat to women than anyone realizes.” [12]
Anonymous: “But it’s not anybody’s fault that you chose a career instead of becoming ‘marriage material’.” [8]
T: “As my mother (a high-level manager at an engineering company) likes to point out, feminism used to mean that women could aspire to anything, and now it has come to mean that they are entitled to it. She has such disgust for the young women she interviews who seem to believe that they’re in for the job just because there’s a woman in charge.” [8]
Anonymous: “Three awkward first dates are usually enough to make most convert to monkhood.”
This was an important point. For young males, attempting to chat to a girl is extremely challenging. If he is badly treated, he is prone to give up. This is not good for other girls that are looking for potential mates. It is necessary that girls are instructed to be polite to any male making a genuine effort. Skilled males are different. They have already learned the skills to chat up the ladies. Ballroom dancing always has the principle that a girl never refuses a dance. It is mostly respected. The girl has the out, because she can say “Thank you.” after the first dance or she can continue dancing.
Gaslov: “The church figured this out long ago. The whole ‘no-sex-before-marriage’ stance was actually there to protect women.” [8]
Old Timer: “You must not be from Alcorn County. Most around here are bums, food stamp maggots, cheaters after the next man coming down the road with money in his pockets because they will not get off their fat lazy butts and work. Not all women are this way but 99.99 percent in this place are.” [1]
Ryan: “I use to do one night stands with women but it kinda scares me because I was always worried about catching diseases like AIDs from women I barely knew.”
Disease control is one reason for promoting monogamy in society. Current promiscuity can only occur at present because we have a good hospital system.
Tony Gaskins: “I married my wife after only ten months of dating. I knew from the first six-hour conversation we had that she was my wife. ” [5]
MrRexels: “You guys have fun with your fucked up relationships and shitty gender dynamics. I’m just gonna chill here in my third world country where that crap is still miles away.”
Anonymous said: “Your wife will humiliate you in public by making nasty comments knowing that you won’t fight back.” [14]
Humankeg: “You’re creating a child with a handicap in life by not having a father.” [8]
Deleted: “Marriage is ... historical enslavement of men that serves women.” [8]
T and A man: “... it is a myth that patriarchy oppresses women. Women demanded men be better, and they did.”
Joshua: “Patriarchy allows women to opt out of the degradation that comes with being a wage slave.”
Joshua: “If a woman builds a strong family with her man their future generations are a testament to their success.”
Joshua: “If a woman focuses on career she dies alone in a nursing home.”
Tony Gaskins: “I believe we should all have a timeline. For me, my timeline would be twelve months for a proposal. ... ” [5]
Ossiana Tepfenhart: “The easiest way to make sure you either get hitched or free yourself up for someone who will pop the question is to basically tell him you expect marriage after a certain amount of time together.” [21]
In the area of reproduction, males have no reproductive rights and precious few legal rights. In the USA in 1865, slavery was abolished in law. However, the concept of slavery has surfaced in the family court system. Men are forced, by the threat of jail, to transfer wealth to women. This even occurs against the backdrop of the popular illogical propaganda that instructs women to be independent of males. This makes a nonsense of the concept women do not need men.
In the new society, males are relegated to the level of sperm donors and child support payers. From 2001-2012, there has been an increase of fifty percent in child support collections from $21 billion to $31.6 billion. [24] Even though eighty percent of divorces are initiated by or caused by women, males finish off in a dire situation. Men can be thrown out by women but women receive a handsome portion of his future income. If the government fails to extract his income, he is jailed. There is no requirement that the money is spent for the benefit of the child. This runs very close to any definition of slavery. The male is forced to pay money to a female to keep out of jail. Unaccountable mothers are effectively selling males into bondage. Women can find a new male and still receive the bondage money from the state enslaved male. The male cannot withdraw which is part of various definitions of slavery.
In an abortion situation, American men cannot legally withdraw from fatherhood after conception. The pregnant female can choose to abort the joint child at any stage. This leads to an interesting question: Who ‘owns’ a child whether before or after birth? The society has an interest as the child will become a member of the society. The child is immediately a citizen of the nation. The extended family has an interest as the child is immediately a member of the family. Both parents have an interest as the child was a fusion of the gametes of the two parents. Abortion decisions are greater than the female.
Males may need to be given the rights granted to slaves in 1865 — to withdraw from the arrangement. The Daily Mail has an interesting report on a model recently proposed in Sweden:
“Expectant fathers in Sweden should have the right to ‘legally abort’ their unborn child up until the eighteenth week of pregnancy, the youth wing of the country’s Liberal Party has proposed. Swedish Liberal Youth argues that men should be given an equal say in whether or not they wish to become a parent, and be granted the option to cut any lawful responsibilities. The suggested ‘legal abortion’ would be irreversible and would see the man renounce all parental duties and rights to see the child once it has been born.”
Males are not given a say in whether they wish to become a parent after the sex act. This is a bias against males in society, while women play the victim card to their benefit. This is affecting male willingness to engage with females. It is affecting male thinking before the problem even arises. The lack of protection of males is seriously affecting females ability to find a mate. Girls have said to me that they might as well just go and have fun because the chances of finding a husband are close to zero.
It is similar for the divorce. The child belongs to the nation, local community, the extended family, and the two parents. To ostracize, banish, deny rights, impoverish, and put a male under constant threat of incarceration is somewhat unfair to the male. But it is also not good for women. But the one that suffers most is the child. Myself, I am more concerned about the plight of women, particularly those that cannot find a husband than I am abought the plight of males. However, I am even more concerned about the plight of the children through the self-interest actions of adults.
What might surprise the reader is that the system is extremely unfair on younger females. Women in their twenties regularly tell me that they cannot find ‘males prepared to commit’, which means marry. Many now tell me that they cannot even find boyfriends. The incarceration of males for the benefit of women means that women cannot find males to marry them. Males have limited voice to express this in the community because media generally espouses the pro-women view. It is not the nature of males to campaign on this topic. Any activism to rectify the situation will have to be by women. The activism will appear as though it is for the benefit of men but it is actually for the benefit of women to encourage males into marriage. Until women make a move to get this fixed, males will be reluctant to marry.
In both abortion and divorce, the rights of the child should supersede the rights of parents, the extended family, community, and the nation-state.
Under nation-state jurisdiction, a woman has all the power. A woman simply has to find an idiot with an income to get her pregnant. She is then entitled to a guaranteed income for eighteen years. She can dump him to the government mandated system which has similarities to slavery. She can then find another man and live under the income of the formerly enslaved idiot and the fresh dupe.
Muslims have a different arrangement. Divorce should be avoided as much as possible, particularly where there are children involved. The Messenger of Allah said: “Divorce is the most hated of all lawful things in the sight of Allah.” [22] The problems of the parties involved should not affect the children. Children are a trust from Allah and they should be treated and looked after in a proper manner. The mother has a right of custody for a male child until the child is capable of taking care of his basic bodily functions and needs, such as eating, dressing and cleaning himself. This is recognized as the age of seven years of age. In the case of a female, the mother has this right of custody until she reaches puberty which is declared as nine years of age. This right is forfeited if the woman remarries. The mother loses custody if she:
Irrespective of who has the right of custody, the other party has visitation rights. It is common for the party having the rights of custody to use the child as a weapon to punish the other party by depriving them of visitation rights. This is against the concepts of Islam. It is considered to be a severe and brutal sin and not in the child’s best interest.
Divorce under Islam operates differently. Islam tolerates divorce and separation of a husband and wife under specific conditions. Divorce is allowed as a last option, but it is discouraged. The community is called upon to arrange for the two families to attempt a reconciliation. Documentation on divorce tends to contain a pro-marriage statement that includes advice that married life should emphasize mercy, compassion, and tranquillity. Each partner in the marriage has responsibilities, which are to be fulfilled in a loving manner in the best interests of the family. Couples are requested to pursue all possible remedies to rebuild the relationship. The Prophet Muhammad said, “Of all the lawful things, divorce is the most hated by Allah.” It is considered that there is nothing more hateful than divorce. Allah hates a man who divorces and marries many women. It is written that: “Marry and do not divorce because surely divorce shakes the very Throne of God.” To prevent divorce, Islam campaigns against its causes such as: The head-dress discourages the leering of men. Effort is made to ensure that males do not lust for nor chase other women. Another influence for divorce is indifference of spouses towards each other and apathy toward the sexual needs of each another. Many divorces and deviations occur when a husband or wife lacks sexual satisfaction. Islam instructs women in the home to dress appropriately, make themselves up in an interesting manner, and display some fervour. Men must maintain standards including hygiene. In lovemaking, each partner must ensure their partner’s satisfaction besides their own. Islam recognizes that the prime reason for most divorces is behaviour incompatibility of spouses. This includes misconduct, discourtesy, nagging, picking quarrels, and stubbornness in the male, female, or both. The Quran states: “If you fear a breach between the two, then choose an arbitrator from his people and an arbitrator from her people. If they both desire reconciliation, Allah shall effectuate concord among them.” The appointed arbitrators determine the problem, listen to wife and husband with fairness and advise each person about their mistakes and shortcomings. The spouses are reminded of their responsibilities. The couple is encouraged to operate with forgiveness, tolerance, observance of marital duties, and determination to fortify their marriage. They attempt to restore harmony in the relationship. Procedural issues with divorce mean that men are impeded from a hasty divorce. Even after conditions of divorce are fulfilled, the marriage can be reconciled. A loveless home is a cold, dark, and sinister place. The loveless home becomes a prison and a fiery hell. Allah said in the Quran: “The parties should either hold together on equitable terms or separate with kindness.” [23] Muslim divorce involves a rigorous reconciliation process operated by the involved families on behalf of the religious authorities. Where the divorce is permitted, the legal processes of the nation-state have to be followed.
The Christian approach to marriage and divorce has been seriously weakened by the encroachment of the nation-state into these matters. Citizens are led to believe that marriage and divorces are a matter for the state. However, since the encroachment of the state into these matters, the rate of marriage has fallen and the rate of divorce has reached epidemic proportions. The Christian approach to marriage was based on love between the partners and included an ‘until death do us part’ approach. This, in some ways, was tougher than the Muslim approach, but Christianity did not have all the reconciliation and philosophy of marriage items written into the protocols. The Church believes that: “Marriage is the first institution created by God”. One can interpret that the Church supports the concept that God states that:
Thus the family is important. Divorce is discouraged or disallowed and the upbringing of the children is important. This contrasts severely with the operation of the nation-state that turns the divorce into a lawyer’s picnic more suited to those that lie and where the demands of individuals override the needs of the child.
Jesus promoted the permanence of marriage and Paul reiterates this by suggesting that marriage was a demonstration of sacrificial love.
Jesus Christ demonstrated the permanent nature and importance of the marital union as expressed in: Matthew 19:3-6 which says: “Some Pharisees came to Him to test Him. They asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?’ He replied: ‘Have you not read, that the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but as one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.”
It is Christians in the West that are suffering the most from the epidemic of divorce and inability to create unions. Thus it is necessary for the individuals of a nation to get closer to their church. The Muslim procedures have suffered significantly less. Some far-thinking women may spot that it may also be necessary to stop the divorces initiated by women. I will not propose this but imagine if a woman that has the voice of media came forward and said: “Custody of children should be offered to the male to prevent the women throwing out the man when she is bored with him.” In the current national habit of belittling males, it will necessary for women to demand fair treatment, status, and vastly improved rights for males to encourage males to marry. Until males are given security and status in marriage, they will not marry and girls will go husbandless.
The marriage vows under Christianity are “until death”. Honesty and truth are required. We do not say something like “until adultery, abandonment, or abuse.” We must modify the marriage vows or modify their application for the institution of marriage so that we stick to the vows. Marriage must be accompanied by a set of instructions that detail the stages of dissolution of the contract. This includes reconciliation procedures, child custody, visitation rights, and financial arrangements. Christianity needs to adopt a set of divorce rules closer to those of Islam.
The chapter is summed up in this blog comment:
John Rambo: “I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?
American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.
This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women. I encourage ALL American men to NEVER MARRY American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.
A few more reasons to stay away from American women?
-30 percent of American women take psychiatric drugs.
-25 percent of women under the age of 30 have at least one STD.
-85 percent of divorces in America are INITIATED by women, thus women are responsible for the vast majority of divorces.
-70 percent of criminals in America were raised by single mothers, thus feminism is responsible for most crime in America.
-60 percent of American women are fat and overweight according to government statistics.
If you want to get married, find a nice foreign girl from Asia, or South America, or Russia/Eastern Europe. DO NOT MARRY AN AMERICAN WOMAN UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES!”
In reality, it is not all women. But you can understand his viewpoint.
I often say to girls: “The easiest thing in life for you girls to do - is to pass exams and find a job. they have even tilted the table in your direction. The hardest ting in life is to find a male prepared to marry you.” They usually quiz me up on the topic then I say: “When you get to seventy, which will you remember: your career or your family?” That really sets them thinking. Some of them rapidly answer: “My family.” Girls have become obsessed with jobs through my lifetime. I meet girls that have been put on antidepressants before they have even finished school. And some who have been on antidepressants within the first few years of becoming a work-slave. However, the obsession with career, persuades them to view career as important, which then makes them judgmental about career and education status in other people. Thus, as girls now out number males in higher education, and in some cases in the workforce, the pool of eligible males is greatly reduced. It also works the other way. Young boys still are brought up to feel that they need to support a wife and family, so there is some feeling of going above their role and station when they chat to a girl of higher educational status and employment status. This makes it difficult for girls in significant careers to find a mate. Girls tend to be more concerned about a male’s source of income. Not all girls are going to find a male with better education nor will they all find someone who is employed. Where there are desirable professions that have fewer than fifty percent female participation, the table is tilted further with quotas. If girls desire to retain this situation, they also have to accept males that are unemployed. When talking to males, you may have to deemphasize your education and job status. It is not entirely their fault that they were imbibed with the concept of man supports woman. A woman called his mother trained him this way.